Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you my Netflix recommendations:

Suspenseful TV Dramas Featuring a Strong Female Lead

Am I a feminist and never realized it? Or is my obsession with Revenge not a particularly well-kept secret?

Classic Witty Romantic Comedies

What can I say? I’m a classy witty chick who likes to laugh. No questions here.

British Crime TV Shows from the 1980s

here’s the only reasoning I was given:

Your taste preferences created this row:

• 1980s
• TV shows

Lol oh Netflix… Who doesn’t love the 1980s and TV shows, honestly?

Critically-Acclaimed Visually-Striking Foreign Dramas

This is where it gets a bit weird. Sorry cinema snobs, but critically acclaimed movies are usually sad or require me to think – not exactly what I’m looking for in entertainment. Also I hate subtitles. Fail, Netflix.

Feel-Good Talking-Animal Animation for ages 8 to 10

Uhhh….awkward. Not that I don’t love feel-good talking-animal animation, actually. Have y’all seen Despicable Me?! Adorbs. It’s just awkward to see this listed with such a specific age group. (Is this indicative of my comprehension level of movies? No wonder I don’t like critically-acclaimed visually-striking foreign dramas!)

Inspiring Biographical Fight-the-System Documentaries

The title of this row makes me go “huh?” Then I saw the first recommendation is about Ben and Jerry building their empire and go “ohhhh.” It’s like Netflix really knows I’d like to be highbrow but love ice cream too much. Whoa, complex. This probably means the rise of the machines can’t be too far off.

Emotional Independent Father-Son Movies

Umm what? I don’t even…..huh? Scratch that last rise of the machines prediction – Netty can’t even get my gender right.

Gritty Thrillers

This probably says a lot more about me than my subconscious preference for strong female leads.

Violent Action & Adventure Based on Real Life

It’s like Netflix refuses to believe I’m a girl. Or is trying to convince me to get in touch with my inner masculine side. (There is nothing wrong with that, right? Completely normal for a chick to be into violent action. Somebody reassure me! …please?)

*Not listed: a bunch of quirky things. Quirky Sitcoms and Quirky TV Shows, etc. What can I say? Apparently I’m quirky. It does have a nicer ring to it than ‘odd,’ which is what I’m used to. So I guess thanks for that, Netty.